i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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