Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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