He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
She even gives head with a lisp.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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