thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
