hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Randomize
