I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
