Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize