Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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