I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Randomize
