i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize
