I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
