ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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