I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
