He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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