I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
