You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
