my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize