Your dad touched me again.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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