hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I want her autograph on my taint
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
