I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
