I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
