SEEEEXXX PLEASE
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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