And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
