I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
