my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
how drunk are you?
Several
I want a musical about memes.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
