Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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