your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
