Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
