I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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