I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
