Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
