If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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