Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
