Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Just pee around me
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
