I wannas sexs uuuuu
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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