I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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