She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
