my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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