dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
