Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
