Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Randomize
