By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
