I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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