somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
