oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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