PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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