I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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