Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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