I only kidnapped one of them. chill
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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