i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
