Joe is yelling at the trees again.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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